Entertainment

The Best Athletes To Have On Your Side In A Zombie Outbreak

Darren - October 4, 2023
Entertainment

The Best Athletes To Have On Your Side In A Zombie Outbreak

Darren - October 4, 2023

Mandatory Credit: Youtube

Alex Honnold

In a zombie outbreak, you would need an endurance athlete who can pull off seemingly impossible physical feats, and Honnold ticks all those boxes. An elite free soloist, Honnold is most famous for climbing the face of El Capitan, one of the greatest achievements ever.

Mandatory Credit: Sports Illustrated

Honnold actually also enjoys living in a van so unlike many of the other athletes on this list, he’s definitely not a diva. He spends the most exhilarating moments of his life millimeters from death. In sum, he’s capable of handling the most terrifying stressful situations.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

Lewis Hamilton

One of the greatest Formula One drivers of all time – and some say the greatest – Hamilton is a legend. He also had a tough childhood with his father abandoning his family at a young age. Incredibly, he even endured bullying at school. It’s hard to believe now that this hyper-confident figure would experience that.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

That’s why he took up karate. So when you add his fighting skills to his incredible driving ability, you’ve got a superb asset on your side. Combine that with the number of properties he owns as well as cars and private jets, and Hamilton is the perfect athlete to have on your side in a zombie takeover.

Dwight Howard
Mandatory Credit: Hoops Habit

Dwight Howard

Howard was one of the nicest players in the NBA throughout his lengthy career. The former center is an eight-time All-Star and a five-time member of the All-NBA first team. Raised in Atlanta, Georgia, Howard still keeps a farm in his home state today. He has exactly 20 snakes as pets as well as cows, hogs, turkeys, and deer.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

Furthermore, he has a collection of about 50 guns. Yes, you read that correctly. In short, Howard has enough firepower to equip a small regiment of soldiers. So if you want an elite athlete who has a small arsenal and also grows vegetables then this is your man. Also, considering the amount of money he donates to charity, he’d actually probably want to help you.

Mandatory Credit: SB Nation

Laurent Duvernay-Tardif

Duvernay-Tardif is a Super Bowl-winning guard with the Kansas City Chiefs. Standing tall at 6″5, he’s a hulking figure. In short, he’s perfect if you need somebody to stand behind when it gets crazy. But that’s not even the main reason why he’s on this list.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

The Quebec native is also the first medical school graduate to play in the NFL. So as well as being a perfect physical specimen he’s also a trained medical practitioner. Forget rubbish first aid from someone who watched a YouTube video. This man is the real deal.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

Deontay Wilder

If you want someone by your side who will do whatever it takes, then Wilder is your man. The former WBC heavyweight champion did lose his title to Tyson Fury. But despite this, he’s still got the scariest knockout power in the division today. He legitimately has the touch of death.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

He possesses an incredible work ethic. Wilder became a boxer just to raise money for his sick daughter’s treatment. Within a couple of years, he was at the Olympics with the US national team. Nobody would make a better bodyguard than ‘The Bronze Bomber.’

Mandatory Credit: ESPN

Carson Wentz

Former NFL quarterback Wentz is a Super Bowl champion. He won his first ring in 2017 and only an injury cost him the MVP award. At 6’5″ and 237 pounds, he’s a beast of a man. But why is he here ahead of someone like Patrick Mahomes?

Mandatory Credit: Wild Fowl Mag

To sum up, it’s because he’s an avid hunter. If you don’t believe us, then just check out his Amazon store. Forget football because hunting is its main theme. As you can see from the pictures above, he’s never happier than when he’s got a dead animal in front of him. Isn’t that nice?

Usain Bolt Olympics
Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

Usain Bolt

What would happen if you needed to get something somewhere very quickly on foot in a zombie takeover?  The majority of us couch potatoes struggle to get to the door to collect a pizza delivery. That’s why Bolt is a magnificent asset for any zombie survival squad.

Mandatory Credit: Sports Illustrated

The Jamaican’s life has been all about running very fast. An eight-time Olympic gold medallist, Bolt is the only sprinter to win Olympic 100m and 200m titles at three consecutive Olympics. If you need someone to race into Walmart for some toilet paper and bullets, Bolt is your man.

Mandatory Credit: Youtube

Chad Mendes

Perennial UFC featherweight contender Mendes never managed to get his hands on the belt. But he did provide some incredible moments of action against brilliant opponents. ‘Money’ is a great wrestler and has genuine knockout power in his hands. Only recently retired he’d definitely still be a great man for a crisis.

Mandatory Credit: Youtube

As well as his fighting skills, he also loves hunting. Throughout his career he hunted much of his food, preferring the protein-rich wild game to supermarket-packaged meat. In sum, Mendes is a great fighter and an excellent shot. He’s not a bad chef either – especially if you love barbecue.

Mandatory Credit: Racer

Kyle Busch

If you need a driver for a crisis then NASCAR legend Busch is your man. Drivers have to go around the track for hours upon end so he’s got incredible endurance. When you add in the heat of that environment and his ability to win under pressure, then you’ve got a man with unique abilities on your side.

Mandatory Credit: Racer

Busch also is a big fan of hunting. NASAR even has a range of hunting gear in his name. ‘The Candy Man’ definitely offers a whole range of skills for an outbreak crisis. The 2015 and 2019 NASCAR Cup Series Champion is a seasoned competitor with no signs of slowing down. He’d be a great getaway driver.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

Jon Jones

UFC heavyweight champion Jones is more than a little bit unhinged. He’s a brilliant MMA fighter so you’d definitely want him next to you in a scrap. Meanwhile, he’s got guns too as we saw when police arrested him for negligent use of a firearm. We don’t condone that, but during the end of the world, nobody will care.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

The other advantage of having Jones by your side is that he’s not afraid to go too far. This is a man who has a self-confessed drinking problem and has been in an insane amount of scrapes. But like a cockroach, he always bounces back. You’ve got to give him credit for that.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

Valentina Shevchenko

It’s obvious that Shevchenko is a spy masquerading as a UFC fighter. First of all, she’s one of the most dominant MMA fighters on the planet, with nobody in the flyweight division able to get near her. However, it’s her extracurricular activities that make her a great person to have by your side.

Mandatory Credit: Essentially Sports

She loves guns so much that she has a Glock tattoo. Meanwhile, her shooting skills match her fighting prowess and she’s devastating on the range. Then when you add in the fact that she can also fly a plane, you see why this woman is probably more ready for an outbreak than anybody else in the world.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

Lebron James

If you want someone streetwise on your side, then nobody is better than James. The Lakers’ hero had a tough upbringing. Raised on the mean streets of Akron, Ohio, he moved from apartment to apartment in seedy neighborhoods with his mother. He knows the meaning of adversity.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

Nowadays, he’s a living legend. With his physical gifts, he’d be an asset to any team during the outbreak. Add in his charisma and you’ve got yourself a real leader. LeBron is also one of the richest athletes on the planet with mansions on the east and west coasts. Take your pick. Oh, and he likes guns too.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

6. Francis Ngannou

Ngannou’s life is straight out of a movie. The Cameroonian famously worked in a sand quarry from the age of 12. Street gangs tried to get the young giant into crime but he rejected them. Then he moved to Paris where he wanted to be a boxer. But he ended up homeless on the streets.

Mandatory Credit: YouTube

However, he would go on to become one of the most frightening MMA fighters in the world. With his power, his understanding of what it means to have nothing, and his will to succeed, Ngannou is the perfect athlete to have by your side during an outbreak.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

Adam Vinatieri

Once the oldest player in the NFL, Vinatieri is a legend of the game. A four-time Super Bowl winner, he’s one of the best placekickers in league history. Vinatieri holds NFL career records for most points scored, most postseason points scored, most field goals made, and most overtime field goals made.

Mandatory Credit: Athlon Sports

However, he also owns Record Breaking Ranch, one of the premier whitetail deer hunting destinations in the US. Vinatieri loves the outdoors almost more than he loves football. He’s hunted since he was a boy in South Dakota. He’s shot big game everywhere from Alaska to Africa.

Mandatory Credit: Sky Sports

Kyle Walker

On the face of it, Walker doesn’t offer more than any other person on this list. Sure, the Manchester City right-back can run fast. But otherwise, he doesn’t have many transferrable skills for the end of the world. Or so you might think. However, there’s something he can offer.

Mandatory Credit: Sky Sports

A wild party. Walker still managed to get two hookers to come to his house even during the pandemic. He got in a lot of trouble but we’re not counting that against him. First of all, he would be incredibly entertaining to have on your team and he’d also be able to help repopulate the world.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

Colt McCoy

Veteran quarterback McCoy knows all about the wild. The New York Giants star had a proper Texan upbringing. As a youngster, he played with BB guns before his dad moved him onto the real thing. However, his father made sure that he respected the power of a gun.

Mandatory Credit: Bleacher Report

Nowadays, McCoy loves to take off to the wilderness for hunting and fishing trips. He also believes that it’s important to only kill an animal if you’re going to eat it. So, in short, he’s well able to clean them after taking them down. Add in his size and athleticism and you’ve got a great teammate for the end of the world.

Mandatory Credit: Twitter

Valerie Loureda

A Taekwondo master who now wrestles for the WWE after fighting for Bellator, she’s one of the most desirable female athletes in combat sports. She’s stunningly beautiful and she knows it with some insane thirst-traps on her social media.

Mandatory Credit: Twitter

With Loureda’s combination of beauty, brains, and brawn she’s the ideal teammate in a crisis. As well as being able to destroy everybody in a fight, she also looks good doing it. And in a time of humanitarian need, it’s the little things that make all the difference. We’d all need that positive energy.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

Conor McGregor

McGregor is perfect for this type of scenario. First of all, he has a mansion, a whiskey company, and a boat. Those are all excellent for a crisis because you can hide away and drink until it’s all over. He’s also a wild man who you definitely would want on your side instead of somebody else’s.

Mandatory Credit: USA TODAY Sports

We know that he can fight because he was a two-weight UFC champion. But he also is just a tad bit unhinged. We’ve seen him punch an old man, throw a dolly at a bus, and spend the night in jail more than once. ‘The Notorious’ has also risen from being on welfare so he wouldn’t moan about having to rough it a bit.

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